When most people think of Japan, they think about sushi, samurai, electronics, maths and family honour. Yet when I hear the word “Japan”, all I can think about is porn, fucking, the used panties industry and tentacles. It’s no wonder that Geisha’s roots are firmly planted in the craziest, weirdest, brightest and sexiest of all countries!

In 1814, artist Hokusai created the woodblock print Tako to ama, (The Dream Of The Fisherman’s Wife) – which became the most famous image in Kinoe no Komatsu, a book of shunga (erotic art). Ever since then, the Japanese culture has been most accommodating of fans of tentacle porn – as evidenced by all the tentacle rapes and octopus orgies depicted in many manga volumes. The hentai genre (from the term hentai seiyoku, meaning “sexual perversion”) quickly became a runaway success, covering all manner of weird and wonderful porn – from women crushing bugs with their stilettoes on a man’s chest, to anthropomorphic characters getting it on. The fun of it is that usually it’s depicted in the typical bright hues associated with comics and anime, which casts a super playful and magical glow over the somewhat jarring image of a schoolgirl getting fucked by both a panda and a tiger simultaneously.

It’s not uncommon for people to look at hentai out of curiosity and find themselves suddenly armed with the most raging boners – the art of it manages to capture sexy in a way that you wouldn’t expect from animation or comic drawings! The biggest joy of the Japanese porn market is that there’s a place for all tastes to feel welcome, and just in case you were assuming that this is all an underground thing that’s hard to access, fear not! Located smack bang in the heart of Akihabara is M, a seven-storey sex store – where the top few floors alone are dedicated to DVDs and wacky costumes. Used panties are easy to source as well, with many stores specialising in them. An old myth emerged about there being vending machines on every street stocking used panties, but this was a lost in translation issue, for those machines were merely selling new panties that had been machine distressed to seem old, much like frayed jeans (stupid tourists).
I can’t wait to visit Japan one day …. tentacle porn for all!