Ladies and gentlemen, roll up, roll up — it’s that time of the year again! The DJ Mag Top 100 DJ list has been announced — and across the realms of virtual media, everyone has gone to town!
…..but seriously, who is surprised the hoodlams Dimitri Vegas and Like Mike took top position? It would take an incredibly naive attitude to believe anything but money secures number 1 these days. I mean, who could compete with the Belgian brothers’ lethal combination of (paid) support from the likes of Jean Claude Van Damme and Charlie Sheen?

Add that to the army of hot tits-out guerilla marketing babes, armed with ipads and accosting the massive crowds of Tomorrowland, shoving pre-filled out touchscreens with Dimitri Vegas and Like Mike already selected in people’s faces, demanding partygoers type in their names and hit submit.

Not to mention WHO THE HELL WEARS THEIR BASEBALL CAP SIDEWAYS PEOPLE?! It takes a very special brand of idiocy to pull off what these sellout siblings have done.

I wonder if they rest easy on their pillows at night, knowing what blatant and embarrassing figures of mockery they are? Guess there’s always Xanax. Maybe that bastion-of-credibility Avicci could help them out.

I say move Dimitri Vagis and I-Don’t-Like Mike from MTV to the Comedy Channel. And get DJ Mag to sponsor the hilarity that ensues.