Will My Love Come in a Ball of Fire?

By Geisha Bar

Will my love come in a ball of fire?

Will it be filled with hope and desire?

Will my love come in the pouring rain?

Am I ready for the joy, am I ready for the pain?

Am I ready for the boy, am I ready for love? …for love?

Taylor Swift

But seriously, how do people know when they’re ready for ‘love’ or at the very least, a relationship? A lot of people might say “well gosh, that’s easy, it just happens!”But realistically, that’s kind of stupid. Love and relationships don’t just happen, or they do but in the same way that the planets line up every few decades.A methodical and timed alignment of all components of one’s life met with a desire for fulfilment from another person.

This week I asked a gentleman via sms if he would like to have a drink with me in the coming days.His RSVP was one of the stranger ones that I’ve received – he waited until after the window I’d provided had closed to then say “Sorry, I don’t want to lead a nice girl on. I’m just not looking for a girlfriend right now.” ….This could mean a world of things.

I’d like to think that his ‘planets’ are all over the place – that is to say, his life is a mess and he has no idea what he wants.Realistically, however, it was probably because I came off as all kinds of crazy when we first met…..Understandable.

Anyway, after this I had to inform the guy that I’m the same blah blah and [insert something eloquent]. It was entirely awkward, although, it got me thinking. Why is it that some people are happy to remain single and others choose to be in dedicated relationships?

The thought of a relationship is quite terrifying. On one hand there’s the part where it doesn’t work out followed by heartache, emotional baggage, etc. On the other hand, and perhaps far worse, there’s always the chance that they might be the right person, ‘love’, and from there in the rest of your life is tied to this person and everything they do and desire. Your life as you knew it evolves entirely; you take on a whole other person. The thought is quite daunting. And what if one day you wake up and you ask yourself… what if?

Yet people do it, and enjoy it. So it can’t be all that bad but is it a matter of fanciful occurrence? , fate? Or, is it subconscious timing? – a point where you click over from thinking the crazy I just said above, to thinking “you know what, maybe having someone else around constantly might not be so bad after all.”

Both options seem equal parts *Miley Cyrus to me.

But who am I kidding? At one point or another we all fall in love and have relationships and make mistakes, it might be difficult sometimes, but it’s probably one of the greatest things we can do with our time and besides, relationships are pretty much your own private fountain of sex, and there ‘aint ‘nuthin wrong with dat!

*”For those who don’t know me,

I can get a bit crazy

Have to get my way, yep

24 hours a day

‘cause I’m hot like that”