20/07

10 Commandments of Clubbing

By roobixops

If you live by these 10 commandments of clubbing – you’re in for a geisha-good time.

Members feel free to educate the “Newbies”

1. Thou shalt take your ID out from your wallet in line to be ready for security. You’ve done this before, you know the drill.

2. Thou shalt use the dancefloor for dancing. Not texting or calling your mother.

3. Thou shalt move for people trying to squeeze past.. Apologise when you bump into someone. Saying sorry doesn’t diminish your humanity. Being an unevolved oaf does.

4. Remember how you place glasses on tables and benches at home? Thou shalt do the same in the club. This list does not include “floor”.

5. Thou shalt not be a bar-twot. Don’t wave your money at the bar staff Wolf-of-Wall-Street-Style, then when you get service, ask what drinks your friends want.

6. Thou shalt not forget that drugs are Illegal.

7. Thou shalt leave the dj to mix in peace. The dj isn’t a walking Shazam, jukebox or cloakroom. You wouldn’t hassle a band so don’t hassle the dj. All are musicians. Get it.

8. Thou shalt let security be security. Leave the batman cape at home kid. If you see a villain being a hassle – tell the boys in white, and let them handle it.

9. Thou shalt keep your hands off female strangers. Ladies, if there’s trouble – come and tell us and we will sort it out – we got your back.

10. Above all else, thou shalt respect the music.