Akika says: Overshare

By Geisha Bar

Following last week’s post about vetting your own online presence, it seems only fitting that this week we consider Constance Hall. For those of you who haven’t come across this woman, she was a contestant on Big Brother and was subsequently booted off for lying about her relationship status during the audition process. “While I thought being a loud mouth swearing binge drinking realist was exactly what every Big Brother voter wanted I was sadly mistaken,” she lamented after her ten days in the house.

Following this brush with fame, she embarked on her new endeavour of “mummy blogging”, often posting controversial shots of herself and her kids naked, breastfeeding and on the toilet. “Keeping it real” never looked so fucking awful. Don’t get me wrong; it’s incredibly important for women to feel good about their bodies and to feel okay about whatever level of parenting they are at. But sometimes I felt like Hall was being aggressive. A red wine in hand, she would bitch about things like her husband Bill daring to ask her for sex while she was RAISING THEIR FOUR CHILDREN ALL DAY. Her merry band of followers became a gaggle of what she referred to as “Queens”, and she then published a book “Like a Queen,” detailing all sorts of parenting gripes. Her followers were usually strongly vehement about their rights as mothers to let their kids run around cafes screaming and were ready to fight to the death if someone dared suggest that perhaps a nice restaurant isn’t the best place for a misbehaving child. To be honest, I don’t even think I have as much of a problem with Hall as I do the people that follow her. Aggressive mothers who want to have their cake and eat it too just kind of fuck me off in general.

Recently Constance and her husband Bill have split up and her online shenanigans could potentially hurt her ability to keep custody of the kids. Once something is online you simply cannot retract it, and comments such as “we hate our jobs so why can’t we hate parenting?” and photos of your children being breastfed and in varying stages of undress is possibly not the greatest look for someone wishing to have sole custody of their children.

Wherever Bill is, I hope he’s finally getting some sex.

Picture: Constance Hall and her ex-husband bill from Instagram @Mrsconstancehall