And so this is Easter. Four days off for parties, last summer hurrah and sweet chocolate indulgence. Especially chocolate – Australians spend over $185 million on the stuff in honour of the holiday annually.

Have you ever thought what secret message, or what purpose your choice of Easter gift sends to your family, friends and beloved?

Here, I’ll decode for you…

• The old packet of Pods and M&M’s trick – “I’ve been too caught up in myself to remember you……so I grabbed this at the servo on the way here”.

• Red Tulip rabbit – does Red Tulip even do anything the rest of the year? This is a gift you’ll give your parents – even though the chocolate sucks just as much as when they gave you the same as a child. Nostalgia is nice……till you bite into it.

• Cadbury Marvellous Creations Bunny – pretty much the Easter equivalent of an Aussie saying “wanna share my Tim Tams?” on a long haul flight to Norway.

• Lindt Gold Bunny – grandparents smugly spoil the bratty young of their progeny with these annually. Husbands buy them for their wives weekly leading up to the holiday in the vain hope of receiving something sweeter in exchange.

  Now that I’ve armed you with eggy knowhow, I’m off to fill my basket. Happy Easter darlings!