Akika Says


Wowee team! It’s time for the return of everyone’s favourite hit TV show, Game of Thrones. I’ve been eager to rush home and congregate with my friends in the lounge to see what Targaryen, Snow, Cersei and that loveable gang are up to this season. It’s been awhile since the previous...
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Sadly I have not yet managed to reverse the process of cellular deterioration, aka the persistent forward march of my age. No matter how much I try to embalm my innards with gin and diet lemonade (because diet soda contains aspartame which is a type of formaldehyde, and thus should preserve my...
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Gently, I smoothed down the covers and held his shaking hand. He looked at me with blue eyes, brimming tears threatening to spill over down his pale cheeks. It had now been over a week since he had left his bed. “I wish I had more time,” he croaked, barely unable to speak. I kindly kissed his...
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It all starts pretty innocently, over a few loose ones at the pub with a couple of your mates from high school. You happily slur sweet nothings to each other, pointing your beer bottles at each other for emphasis, sealing the bromance with a few rogue splashes on each other’s t-shirts. You’re...
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Ivan Fandino, a 36 year old matador has recently died in the ring - he had tripped on his cape and the bull gored him, piercing his lung, leading to death in the ambulance afterward. Naturally, the internet had a few things to say, namely that he was a horrible jerk who deserved what he got. I...
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Shitty housemate situations – we’ve all been there. The guy who refuses to do literally any form of cleaning or tidying up after himself. The girl who never pays her bills on time yet suspiciously always has money to go out and get herself skanky shit from Supre to go clubbing every week. The...
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Akika says: No love

By Geisha Bar
We well and truly live in a time whereby open homophobia and hate speech against anyone who flies a rainbow flag is NOT FUCKING OKAY. Margaret Court should definitely be renamed because it’s abhorrent to think that anybody who speaks such backward and intolerant views deserves to have any kind of...
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Hands up if you’re still on the clock when you’re not at work. Hands up if you constantly get non-urgent but still work-related text messages or emails from your boss outside of work hours. Hands up if you’re sick of it. 27 years ago, a wonderful thing happened to us – the...
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Um… how do you handle days when you don’t know what to do or say or think? I just lay in bed and order food, but I don’t think that’s such a good idea. So I’m gonna ramble on until I figure out what would be better. I’m talking of course, about those dreaded bender enders. D-Day plus...
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Just wanting to have a wee rant this week about a video that I’ve seen shared around Facebook a bit. About a month ago, a family (dad, mum, two year old and a baby) were kicked off a Delta flight after the dad held up the flight by arguing with air stewards. The online furore was palpable! How...
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