Akika Says

19/03

Love the neighbours

By Geisha Bar
6597a6a8-1e66-11e7-9ee2-71711d53e994
Late last week, our neighbours over in New Zealand experienced a very dark day, at the hands of an Australian man. I’m talking of course, about the Christchurch massacre. 49 people were killed at two mosques, gunned down by an Islamophobic terrorist. A further 48 were wounded, and the killer...
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12/03

Akika
I was but an early primary school youth when the single Breathe came out, yet nonetheless I was taken with it immediately - I hadn't heard anything like it on the radio in amongst all the Spice Girls and Robbie Williams at the time. When the Smack My Bitch Up music video came out, my older brother...
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05/03

Micromanagement

By Geisha Bar
akika
Fellas, would you lie to your lady about your size? Ladies, would you marry a guy before even knowing what he's packing? Now I'm no size snob, but if I'm going to be honest, I really do have a minimum amount of dick that I consider necessary in order to have a relationship. And that's not a...
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26/02

Accidental Running

By Geisha Bar
akika
You know how Fat Amy in Pitch Perfect does "horizontal running"? Well recently I found myself doing what I like to call "accidental running." 
I've never been a runner, ever – even at the height of my school-sports-every-day fitness, I still declared that I "couldn't run." Running was...
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19/02

Akika
Here in Western Australia, it looks like there is an increasing distance forming between some in the vegan and non-vegan communities. A video has emerged of Jason Parravacini, a farmer brandishing a shotgun at some outspoken vegans who were filming his cattle. It's believed that this altercation...
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12/02

apr18_13_HBRStaff
Recently I was watching the Black Mirror feature, Bandersnatch, and I was thinking how great it would be for someone else to make my decisions. As a uni student, I spend a lot of time making decisions; usually involving my schedule, where I try to fit in my classes, assignments, my workouts,...
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05/02

VIVA LAS VEGAN

By Geisha Bar
Vegan
Strayan vegans are at it again! A vegan bride-to-be has banned all non-vegans from coming to her wedding. Not just people who refuse to eat vegan on the day; but people who refuse to be vegan fullstop. The bride-to-be wrote on a vegan Facebook group: "When your 'family' tries to guilt trip...
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29/01

flash-2568383_1280
I'M HIGHLY ANNOYED AT SO MUCH STUFF TODAY! 1. Neighbours Banging. Unfortunately if you want to live in an inner city setting these days, often your home is literally attached to your neighbour's via apartment-style setup. I'm currently writing this listening to the merry fucking smashing of my...
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22/01

cropped
SOME SOBERING THOUGHTS TO MAKE YOU THINK 'BOUT SHIT AND TO MAKE YOU DANCE MORE! 1. We only have ONE LIFE to live. That’s roughly 90 years, in a best-case scenario. Think about this minus your current age and then consider your shifting perspective of how fast time moves as you grow older (each...
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15/01

Living in a Vacuum

By Geisha Bar
vaccination
The recent outbreak of measles has brought back that old chestnut, the vax/anti-vax debate. Well I don't know about you guys, but I am firmly pro-vaccinations, mainly because I'm not stupid. But also because I understand how to think logically and critically instead of just DoInG sOmE rEsEaRcH oN...
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08/01

Everything is Good

By Geisha Bar
world
FIVE THOUGHTS AS WE APPROACH A NEW DAWN aka, Akika gets wistful. 1. Everyone is a standalone universe. That person who you just swore at in your car has a life as rich and varied and full as you do, filled with memories, anxieties, fears, love, lust and worries. The fact that the atoms that...
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31/12

Be Kind, Rewind

By Geisha Bar
be kind
As we say goodbye to 2018, it is worth thinking about the years gone by. There was once a simpler time, a time that involved rollerblades, $1 mixtures, "young adult" fiction a.k.a. Sweet Valley High, and the hallowed halls of the local Blockbuster video rental store. I'm talking porno titles in an...
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24/12

christmas-2015-wallpaper-5
Every year without fail there are the 12 People of Christmas. Behold: 12. The Frazzled Retail Staff Member. The poor thing is almost out of "study drugs" and it's only December 20th! She's racking up 34, 000 steps per shift "checking out back" for all you ungrateful pricks, so cut her some...
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18/12

297
I was recently in Auckland International Airport and had some time to kill, so I got a bit drunk and made some observations. - Everything is so pristine and glowing with white lights on gold trim. - The men working retail here are better groomed than me on a good day. - I love sitting in an...
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11/12

Not Fappy Jan

By Geisha Bar
AKIKA
Tumblr is banning porn. As of 17 Dec this year. Sayyyyy whaaaaat? Yeah. Tumblr now warns that material including "photos, videos, or GIFs that show real-life human genitals or female-presenting nipples, and any content—including photos, videos, GIFs and illustrations—that depicts sex acts"...
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05/12

Summer
1. Finish that one thing (or list of things) that you've been meaning to do for ages. Seriously. Aren't you sick of "never getting around to it"? How amazing would you feel if you had NOTHING nagging at you, no incomplete loose ends to be tied up? Do this as fast as you can, so that you can enjoy...
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22/11

Gardening Season

By Geisha Bar
gardening
Sunday Nov 18 heralded the return of summer! I refer of course, to the Habitat Garden Party: Start of Summer Edition!!!! Promising "music and mayhem with sweeping lakeside views, like-minded people, relaxed dress code, unpretentious atmosphere, epic sunset and sumptuous house vibes", Habitat's...
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13/11

Bedside Manner

By Geisha Bar
Screen Shot 2018-11-13 at 1.22.48 PM
This week I had the misfortune of being admitted to the ED at a hospital which shall remain unnamed for the purposes of discretion for the person involved in this story. By the way dear friends, there is no need to worry - no harm has come to your Akika (it was just a spot of garden variety...
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06/11

Sail Away

By Geisha Bar
plane
I have a world map above my desk at home. It has exactly 66 little star stickers on it, colour-coded red and green to denote places I have been (15) and places I want to go (51). The stars generally fall into a few "big trips". North Africa, Europe and Scandinavia would constitute a giant...
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30/10

beyonce
Things That Piss Me Off #328527 That godawful quote "You have the same 24 hours a day as Beyonce". GAHRHGJHDGSBDLJBYFYLBEF. No. Just no. Fucking no. Here is my day: 05:30: Wake up. 05:30-06:15: Get dressed and travel to the gym. 06:15-07:15: Work out 07:15-08:30: Travel home, shower and...
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